Is It Every NBA Fan’s Dream To Lay Out A Celtics Fan? Probably

There are pretty much 2 or 3 reasons that sober pardongme would find reasonable reasons for starting a fight intoxicated. One is if I get cockblocked. Getting laid comes harder than winning the lotto these days. I literally hit a 8 team parlay before finding some drunk chick willing to let me over. Just shit out of luck in the vagina department these days so if the opportunity presents itself and you got in the way, then I’m pretty sure you deserved to get your ass kicked. I don’t know what the second reason is yet, but the third is cutting me at a burrito truck. If I woke up with a black eye and and a buddy told me it was a beauty mark someone gave me while trying to get in front of me and a al pastor burrito with no frijoles, then I’ll wear that shit proudly.

Anyways, for sure I thought it was going to be mano y mano between Brian Scalabrine and the black guy? Did not see this one coming. Black guy just runs his mouth about chicken shits and walks away. Let’s Mobys doppelgänger throw some seriously awkward crosses to the Celtics fan til he drops and homeless people wearing cement iii’s start picking up change falling out of his pockets. Thats a worldstarhiphop video for you.


I can probably only think of one other person that deserves to get put to sleep like that and it’s either me, Ben or Lana. We live on borrowed time here on loudmouse. Just a matter of time before someone catches wind of how much shit we talk. We’re practically just asking to get shot in the face. So admitting that, I feel I’m at liberty to say this guy had this shit coming to him. Thought the quiet guy was just gonna walk away and then fucking loudmouth had to hold up the remote like he was going to do something. Poor dude. Probably has to find some new friends because there is absolutely no coming back from that.

High School Girls In Australia Give Head for 80 Cents A Minute. Breaking News, Q And Lana Are Moving To Australia

Cafeteria’s in Australia better start buckling down. Boys are going to start starving because they’re about to face the toughest decisions of their high school careers. Lunch or a blowjob? Can’t have both. Either you spend $1.60 on pizza and milk, or have the best two minutes of your day. Don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m taking blowjob over cafeteria food everytime. I’m paying in pennies, nickels, Australian quarters I do not care. Selling my iPhone if it means more dome for little Dong. Cafeteria food absolutely sucks and no way I’m spending allowance if I know what else it can buy me.

These girls really payed attention in econ though huh. What’s the first rule of supply and demand? If demand increases and supply remains unchanged, then it leads to higher equilibrium price and higher quantity. Something like that. If the demand for blowjobs increases and you still have 3 girls willing to suck dick for 80 cents a minute, it leads to $48.00 an hour for 3 horny ass girls about to go to jail for prostitution. Something like that.

Chinese People Like Eggs Boiled w/ Boys Urine

I don’t get this shit at all.
Why? Why is it China that always has some nasty fetish going on?
I don’t mean to be stereotyping but what the fuck?
It’s not enough that you can find gourmet rats and roaches burning on the side of the street, you have to boil eggs with urine? Not even regular urine, children’s urine.
I love but sometimes it puts Asians on blast, in the worst way possible too. I guess I can imagine Pardong being Chinese because he likes to mold dried sperm and use it for chapstick. Fuckin psycho.

Just A Bunch of White People Escaping Death

Fuck all that explorer noise. Leave that to the rich and stupid to commit stunts that could end your life in 2 seconds. I’m all about that get rich and die stupid late with bajillions of dollars. Honestly speaking, I wish I had a set of balls that allowed to do shit like that. I can’t even ride Jaguar at Knotts without peeing in my pants a little. Instead I have the set of balls nobody likes. The kind that doesn’t work. I’m the biggest pussy when it comes to shit that might end my life. Like even when I ride a bike I need a helmet and some knee pads. I’m that dude in the backseat with his seat belt on. I get scared watching videos like this in IMAX at the Science Museums. Kudos to all of you assholes who aren’t scared to do shit like bungyjump or skydive. I’m genuinely jealous.


If there’s one thing I hate, it’s people selling weed in front of my house. I just wanna go out and punch the shit out of them until their shoes fall off. Granted in front of my house, they’re high school kids on skateboards and Razor scooters, but nothing makes my mansion seem more urban than it should than a couple of “goons” slanging that herb out there. Completely get what this guys saying. Favorite part of the video hands down. “You just gonna let him beat my ass?” AHAHAHAHAH what a vagina.

This Bitch Really Doesn’t Want To Take Her Final

At what point do you think this girl decided she was gonna go verbal columbine in class today? I’m pretty sure she didn’t wake up with some prophetic voice from God telling her to get all terrorist mode in evolution class. No no. At some point last night she decided, fuck this. I can’t take this final? Even if I have to kill everybody in class, I’m not taking the evolution 101 final. Some kids buckle down and go into zombie mode at the library and other kids smoke crack before a final. How ironic is it that this happened in an evolution class.

She had me at I need ” ya check ta inside ya asshole.”

The Word Fail Is Really Over Used But In This Case It’s Fitting

Have you seen someone more deserving of having a TV fall on them? Like if some foreign exchange student just came over from China and came up to you. John, what does this karma mean? Oh Lee let me show you this video. Karma is when you’re being obnoxious as fuck and singing a Taylor Swift song off key and a TV falls on you. Actually Karma would be in the TV landed on orange girl and the cameraman too.


We can embed Worldstarhiphop videos now. Uh oh. This is bad news for everybody who isn’t a part of loudmouse. I feel like we can write posts all day just from worldstar alone and that’s whats been holding us back. It’s literally the best material on the web. Anyways check out this asshole laying his friend out with a kick straight out of a Tekken game. The only thing I hate about watching something like this is the fact that its 5 seconds long. Whats the back story to this? Did he make fun of his mom? Did he owe him money? Is he getting initiated into a gang? I demand to know these kinds of things.